One thing we all know about the world of autism is the multiple therapies that are around. In the beginning you are made to feel usually by other autism parents if you do not jump on every available therapy there is you are not doing all you can for your child.
I have never been a jump on the bandwagon type of person so many of the so called therapies I would never consider. (i.e. DAN doctors, chelation, no vaccines or flu shots, and the list goes on). On top of this you add neurologist, psychologist, speech therapists, ABA, OT, PT and on and on. Really who has time for all of this. Sometimes you are looked down upon when you walk away from the therapies.
For the most part I have. Roger receives OT, Speech, and sees a psychologist. He needs these to function. We see his neurologist every 6 months to check in and his neuropsychologist once a year. This works for us. As it is he already has 3 hours a week private therapy. He is going into middle school he wants to do after school activities and he has to have time to do his homework. So with school, his therapies, after-school stuff, and homework a lot of time is already taken up he needs some down time in there too.
His neurologist agrees with me. When it came down to time lines therapy was going to be close to 40 hours a week. Really he needs to be a kid not someones guinea pig. What better way to teach him social skills and have him practice them to have him out in the world not in an office.
I have literally been yelled at for not going to a DAN doctor. First off I think they are quacks. Second off even if I had wanted to I don't have thousands sitting around to pay for supplements and testing. We have a hard enough time as it is just keeping food on the table and the lights on. Then it was Roger was not tested for heavy metals by an approved facility. Um he was tested in his doctors office when they thought he was having seizures they wanted to rule that out, which it was. I think my family doctor is an approved facility.
The kid has been a pin cushion and guinea pig long enough and this mom has decided enough is enough. No more tests (all his doctors agree). What does he need to function. If it is not absolutely essential then we don't need or want it. And if wanting my kid to experience the world for himself all the good, bad, ups and downs makes me a bad mom then so be it!
Is a "You go, girl" too much? :-) You're a mom doing what you think is best for your child, with the guidance of the team you've created to help you.
ReplyDeleteI love this post! I too do not give in to all the therapies and I hate, hate, hate the kids being pin cushions. I just want my kid to be happy and have fun!
ReplyDeleteThis is Rae Rae from Autism Moms- I have tried to post a comment to your last 3 or 4 blog posts and my blogger account always messes it up, so if it says Anonymous, it's me!
ReplyDeleteLove it, love it lots. My son does ABA, and it works for us... but you know, all kids are different. My son NEEDS structure, without it he will sit and veg out... And still, there are times when some activity I signed us up for has me praying I'm not pushing him too hard. I always follow Temple Grandin's advice- the worst thing to do is just to allow your child to sit around being unproductive all day. And that's just any kid, NT, ASD, whatever. A kid being a kid is AWESOME. After school activities? AWESOME! School? We're learning, right? I mean isn't that the real reason to seek out treatment- so a child can have a happy life and function in the REAL world? From everything I've read, it sounds like you have a lovely little boy and a great family.
I think parents judge other parents because it helps them feel like they have more control over their children's outcome that way. The mindset is "If Sally's not doing everything, her kid might not be okay, but I'm doing everything, so my kid will definitely be okay." With ASD and all the expensive treatments out there, many parents feel the need to lash out to justify their own spending. My heart goes out to anybody who desperately tried to do the right thing and is struggling with some self doubt :\