Outed

Yep that's right someone Roger trusted got mad and outed him at school.  He has told very few people he is autistic and that's his choice.  He dose share with closer friends whom he feels he can trust.  One of these people broke that trust. I'm still getting bits and pieces of the story.  I do know he already asked the person who did it why? He also let them know he no longer wanted to be friends because he can't be friends with someone he can not trust.

 Not sure what they thought they were going to get out of it? Embarrass him? No that didn't happen. Make people not like him? That didn't happen either.  The only person that has any obvious backlash from the whole situation is the person that ran their mouth.  They are the embarrassed one.  They are the one that no one wants to talk to because now they are known as someone that can't keep their mouth shut something very important to teenagers.

That dose not mean there has been no negative effect on Roger.  Sure no one has been mean to him because of the disclosure but now everyone has questions.  He unwilling has been thrust into the spotlight and become the poster boy for autism.  How would you like it if overnight you went from minding your own business to a onslaught of questions?  It's not fun.

Do I think any of the kids mean harm with their questions? Of course I don't.  They don't realize being questioned all day long is stressful and overwhelming.  Some of the questions are about autism. Some are just random fact questions that they think he should know.  He knows a lot but he dose not know everything.

Before I even found out about all this one of his teachers and his case manager had stepped in and offered their help.  Case manager said send them to me.  The teacher has offered her classroom anytime during the day as a safe place that he can go.  I have a call into the principle who has been great this year so I'm sure she will have her own ideas of what can be done at school to help alleviate his stress.

As for at home, we have talked a little about it.  He knows that he dose not have to answer any questions if he dose not want too.  He can ask people to please leave him alone, go to a teacher ask for help if needed.  If he wants to answer the question go for it.  It is his choice.  It may not have been his choice to be thrust in the spot light but it is his choice if he wants to back away from it or stand in it.  No matter what he decides to do it will be his choice and he has the support of his family and teachers either way. As of now his focus is getting into one of the high school honors programs, and make sure he gets his schedule set right so he can get into the college of his choice. (that is a whole other post)

The overall thing we all need to remember is it is the autistic individual's right to decide when, how, and if other people are told.  No one has the right to take that away from them and thrust them into the spotlight.